Match, Moving, and More Miserable Weather

Days left until rank day: 16
Days until match day: 38

We had a class meeting last week where the realities that match day and graduation are quickly approaching were reinforced to all of us! Our final rank lists are due by 9 p.m. EST on February 21, Match is Thursday, March 15, and the realization that, less than four months from now, I will be out of here, kind of hit hard.

I have again been struggling with the whole rank thing. I have sort of been in denial for a while that I really have to make a decision, enter the NRMP site, and order programs. I hoped that by just "hanging out" and not actively thinking, everything would become clear. However, I've found that I still go back and forth between a few. While I thought I was not all alone with all this rank turmoil, it seems that everyone else has sort of decided already on their order. Although it's a very normal and expected question at this stage in the game, I really don't like answering the query, "So where do you want to go?". I DON'T KNOW.

I did, however, finally enter the website to check it out, as we were told not to wait until the last minute because the servers could be down. You can certify your list, renumber, recertify, etc. as many times as you want until the Feb. 21 deadline. But it was helpful for me to actually put some programs in, to protect against NOT MATCHING should my denial continue for the next couple of weeks.

For some reason, I find it surprising that people are freely sharing where they really want to go. But maybe I would if I actually knew. I just think that telling others rank order may make you disappointed if you don't get your #1. Maybe I'm being insecure/unconfident that I would even go where I put down #1. Maybe I'm hedging because I don't want to get my hopes up for one place in particular and be disappointed by being rejected/not matching there. I'm not sure. I am so jealous everyone else seems calm and settled. Thank you to everyone that has tried to help me figure this out. It is a tough, very personal decision which seems much weightier than any I have made in the past (i.e. college, med school)-- is it just because I'm older?? I am really hoping and praying for guidance that I will know what to do when it is "time."

Okay, enough moping for now. Onto moving.

I've been a good girl and have been trying to clean out closets, bookshelves, etc. ahead of time so that it's not all hectic when I have to move in May. I tend to be a bit of a packrat-- I went through a bunch of boxes this weekend and finally got rid of some college notebooks I thought I might use someday. This was probably the 2nd or 3rd time I had considered throwing out some of this stuff but the first that I felt comfortable parting with it. It was very therapeutic to get rid of my anatomy notes from first year! It was also fun to discover some papers and cards that I had forgotten about (from i.e. first year). But I know that I am making my (moving) life much easier by jettisoning some of this weight (/junk, arguably) now rather than later...

I donated a bunch of books to the library and also sold some to a used textbooks place. But I have a ton of school supplies-- looseleaf, notebooks, folders, binders, etc. that I don't think I'll ever use. Other than bringing them with me to Nigeria to give away, does anyone have any other suggestions of what I might do with some of this stuff? Any organizations looking for this stuff right now? I can only tackle the cleaning-out-of-stuff a little at a time. One day, it was my desk. Another, it was my closet. I will be getting to the file cabinet eventually, but I'm still working on the binders.

Okay, thirdly, a little griping about the weather. Although I agree it is cool to see bubbles freeze and boiling water "snow" because it's so cold outside (see Kristen/Wendi's blogs), -19 degrees (the temperature, without windchill, when I left for the hospital this morning) is NOT fun to walk around in. Today, I even sacrificed fashion for comfort (soooo unlike me ;) ), wearing my big, bulky MN coat to the hospital. Although my face was still cold, I really did stay pretty warm. It is -11 (-29 with windchill) as I write this. The HIGH is supposed to get up to 4 tomorrow. Yippee!!! I will have to decide also what to do with this coat when I move...