I haven't blogged in a few weeks. This usually happens when I'm working a lot and/or there's not to much "fun" to report. We've also been extremely busy getting settled in our new house, as well as with our strong-willed child. Here's an "update" entry to keep you posted, as many of you have asked how things are going.
The house
The house is really coming together! We've been here since the first of the month, and are about 99% moved in. It was a huge help to have Kelvin's parents here for the first half of the month, and we have most of the furniture assembled (a couple of things still need to arrive), and most everything put away, with just a few more things to hang on the walls. It is really nice to feel settled, with the house now feeling much like a home. Not knowing where anything was was driving me nuts! I love the layout of this place, and feel so comfortable in our cozy, quiet retreat.
Work
Work has been busy. Family medicine clinic continues to challenge and burn me out on my long days, with unending patient calls and requests, refills, and administrators asking more and more of us (when appointment times aren't getting any longer). Labor and Delivery has been steadily busy, too. I had an emotionally difficult last weekend on call, with a few long inductions and with having to negotiate with patients over the plans of care to help their babies arrive safely.
Parenthood
It's not been a good couple of weeks for me in the mom department (see Dark Parenting Truths) with lots of tears (from toddler and me).
Frustrated. Regretful. Angry. Trapped. Defeated. Hopeless. Devastated. Broken.
This is what I was feeling, and I have definitely been struggling emotionally with "am I going to make it through?" this parenting thing.
K and I are both extremely tired and irritable with continued sleep challenges in our toddler (eating, car, and changing tantrums are also pretty frequent). Last week, we got a toddler night light/clock (stoplight which you can pre-set to go from red "get/stay in bed" to green at a wake-up time you deem acceptable in the morning) to encourage Iver to stay in bed a bit longer than.... 4:30 a.m., which was his "up for the day" wake-up time most days of the week and not sustainable for us/me (with day and sometimes up-all-night jobs, and with me not being a good napper) and my sanity.
Kelvin's been manning the night wakings lately to extinguish the nighttime nursing...which just happened this week (which I'd consider a step in the right direction). Now, after using the light, we are getting wake-up times a bit past 5 a.m... which is better, but there's still a lot of crying going on throughout the night and I just want it to stop.
Another book, which I really needed to read this week, was All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenting by Jennifer Senior. While it hasn't helped anyone sleep better, it least validated that I'm not alone in feeling frustrated and, frankly, pretty down much of the time (its basic point is that adults with kids [especially those with children under the age of two] are generally, concretely, less happy than those without, but there is this other type of joy [that perhaps becomes apparent later, when you are actually not losing your mind from sleep deprivation?] that comes from being a parent).
Iver
He turned 19 months this week. He is an exhausting bundle of energy and extremely strong-willed and persistent, but also has a very sweet and endearing personality.
He weighed in at 20 lbs 4 oz last week, steady in the 4% for weight (17% for height and 50% for head).
He is regularly pooping and peeing on the potty and lets us know when he has to go (i.e. before it becomes a code brown in the bathtub--two thumbs up!!), or sometimes just after he goes (which is still a step in the right direction).
He's talking and imitating a lot, and probably has about 40 words. He still signs some, but words are taking over.
He loves: fruit, yogurt (there is a cry of "Gogurt!!" every morning or every time we open the fridge), nursing, walks in the neighborhood and any outside time he can get, climbing on anything, opening/closing and locking/unlocking things/doors, animal-identifying, scribbling, building, using our computer keyboards, singing songs, taking baths and running water, and reading books.
He hates: straps (carseats), getting dressed, going to bed and staying asleep, and eating anything other than fruit, yogurt, or a few bites of soft veggies, ground meats, fish, or crunchy snacks or wafers.
His sleep (as above) is still quite erratic. He goes down somewhere between 7:30 and 8:30 p.m., and wakes 1-3 times before being up around 5 a.m. (sometimes earlier). He can sometimes do one, long mid-day nap if he slept well, but sometimes needs a mid-morning nap to make it through the day. We are working really hard at nighttime sleep training right now, having a window when I don't have a heavy call load, we don't have guests, and we aren't traveling anywhere. We are doing graduated extinction with the middle-of-the-night wakings (Kelvin going in to keep me, and my milk, out of sight), and hope to have some better nights' rest soon.
Please send positive parenting thoughts my way.
That is the update for now!
Enjoy the most recent pics
With twilight turtle, a gift from my sister
At Judo Hut gymnastics (open play gym in Arcata with drop-in times on Saturday mornings)-- with his other December birthday buddies!
Some snaps of the new house:
Our bedroom
The house
The house is really coming together! We've been here since the first of the month, and are about 99% moved in. It was a huge help to have Kelvin's parents here for the first half of the month, and we have most of the furniture assembled (a couple of things still need to arrive), and most everything put away, with just a few more things to hang on the walls. It is really nice to feel settled, with the house now feeling much like a home. Not knowing where anything was was driving me nuts! I love the layout of this place, and feel so comfortable in our cozy, quiet retreat.
Work
Work has been busy. Family medicine clinic continues to challenge and burn me out on my long days, with unending patient calls and requests, refills, and administrators asking more and more of us (when appointment times aren't getting any longer). Labor and Delivery has been steadily busy, too. I had an emotionally difficult last weekend on call, with a few long inductions and with having to negotiate with patients over the plans of care to help their babies arrive safely.
Parenthood
It's not been a good couple of weeks for me in the mom department (see Dark Parenting Truths) with lots of tears (from toddler and me).
Frustrated. Regretful. Angry. Trapped. Defeated. Hopeless. Devastated. Broken.
This is what I was feeling, and I have definitely been struggling emotionally with "am I going to make it through?" this parenting thing.
K and I are both extremely tired and irritable with continued sleep challenges in our toddler (eating, car, and changing tantrums are also pretty frequent). Last week, we got a toddler night light/clock (stoplight which you can pre-set to go from red "get/stay in bed" to green at a wake-up time you deem acceptable in the morning) to encourage Iver to stay in bed a bit longer than.... 4:30 a.m., which was his "up for the day" wake-up time most days of the week and not sustainable for us/me (with day and sometimes up-all-night jobs, and with me not being a good napper) and my sanity.
Kelvin's been manning the night wakings lately to extinguish the nighttime nursing...which just happened this week (which I'd consider a step in the right direction). Now, after using the light, we are getting wake-up times a bit past 5 a.m... which is better, but there's still a lot of crying going on throughout the night and I just want it to stop.
Another book, which I really needed to read this week, was All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenting by Jennifer Senior. While it hasn't helped anyone sleep better, it least validated that I'm not alone in feeling frustrated and, frankly, pretty down much of the time (its basic point is that adults with kids [especially those with children under the age of two] are generally, concretely, less happy than those without, but there is this other type of joy [that perhaps becomes apparent later, when you are actually not losing your mind from sleep deprivation?] that comes from being a parent).
Iver
He turned 19 months this week. He is an exhausting bundle of energy and extremely strong-willed and persistent, but also has a very sweet and endearing personality.
He weighed in at 20 lbs 4 oz last week, steady in the 4% for weight (17% for height and 50% for head).
He is regularly pooping and peeing on the potty and lets us know when he has to go (i.e. before it becomes a code brown in the bathtub--two thumbs up!!), or sometimes just after he goes (which is still a step in the right direction).
He's talking and imitating a lot, and probably has about 40 words. He still signs some, but words are taking over.
He loves: fruit, yogurt (there is a cry of "Gogurt!!" every morning or every time we open the fridge), nursing, walks in the neighborhood and any outside time he can get, climbing on anything, opening/closing and locking/unlocking things/doors, animal-identifying, scribbling, building, using our computer keyboards, singing songs, taking baths and running water, and reading books.
He hates: straps (carseats), getting dressed, going to bed and staying asleep, and eating anything other than fruit, yogurt, or a few bites of soft veggies, ground meats, fish, or crunchy snacks or wafers.
His sleep (as above) is still quite erratic. He goes down somewhere between 7:30 and 8:30 p.m., and wakes 1-3 times before being up around 5 a.m. (sometimes earlier). He can sometimes do one, long mid-day nap if he slept well, but sometimes needs a mid-morning nap to make it through the day. We are working really hard at nighttime sleep training right now, having a window when I don't have a heavy call load, we don't have guests, and we aren't traveling anywhere. We are doing graduated extinction with the middle-of-the-night wakings (Kelvin going in to keep me, and my milk, out of sight), and hope to have some better nights' rest soon.
Please send positive parenting thoughts my way.
That is the update for now!
Enjoy the most recent pics
At the Samoa Dunes on a sunny Saturday
With twilight turtle, a gift from my sister
At Judo Hut gymnastics (open play gym in Arcata with drop-in times on Saturday mornings)-- with his other December birthday buddies!
Some snaps of the new house:
Office
Living Room
Iver's room...
...and wall decal
Our bedroom
